12

I'm longing for a trip, though not one for vacational purposes or anything of the sort.
I want to solitarily go away somewhere (Walden Pond, perhaps?) hah.
In all seriousness though, I really want to get away from society.
Clear my head, align my emotions.
Liberate myself of all societal restraints.

I want to get to know myself better. I don't know who I am anymore. I once was morally strict and had high expectations of myself. Old fashioned would be a safe term.
All of these moral rules and expectations of myself seemed to have already been broken.
Why? Why did I do this to myself?
Don't take this the wrong way; I regret nothing. Experience is life.
I just don't know what it was exactly that made me break my own rules.

I want to return back to my old-fashioned moralistic self. Is it too late now though since my rules have been broken and expectations haven't been met?
Only through a solitary escape will I find clarity and alignment of the self.

I suppose it's time for a moral tune-up. I should go tune-up my honda while i'm at it while my warranty still pays for it.

11

Last night I dreamt that I was lost. I was in the woods somewhere and the sun was setting; the clouds were reflecting a vivid violet and pinkish blend. Silence took over the atmosphere.
The weird part is that I didn't feel frightened, confused, or alone. In fact, I don't remember feeling anything at all. I was just aimlessly navigating myself through these woods.
There were miles and miles of beautiful pine trees. Finally I stumbled upon a winding creek. I kneeled down to look closer at my reflection. The mirror image looked exactly like me, but for some peculiar reason I didn't recognize myself. My reflection looked back at me as if it wasn't my own. It seemed to glare at me-a judgmental stare. However, not even this could remove me from my calm and apathetic state. My disposition remained composed and I woke up.
Weird.